"You Hear What You Want To Hear"

Let me begin this blog post by saying I'm very upset. I will get into what has made this way in a moment. But first I must say that I'm odd and quite a difficult person to live with. I know this and my family knows it all too well. With that said what I'm about to share is coming from my skewed and distorted point of view.

Today the youth group will be having MYOP, make your own pizza night. I get ingredients that are cheap and often not the best for someone who is counting calories and watching his sodium intake. At times I choose not to have dinner with the group because I just shouldn't eat what they are having. Tonight I planned everything out so that I could eat with the kids. I logged all my food intake for the day in advance so that I knew where my numbers would fall. The computer program I use has the motto of going green. When everything is done properly I get all green bars indicating I did my part for becoming healthy and losing weight. Well, I planned out my dinner after breakfast and figured out what I could eat for lunch without messing up for the day. Messing up is indicated on this program as being in the red. Red is bad. I went to the kitchen to cook some chicken and make a salad. I say some chicken breast in the fridge thawing out and in my skewed mind decided they were OK to eat. Kirsten and I had recently been buying a new brand of chicken due to the fact that most frozen chicken is injected with sodium "flavor". I thought this was some of the natural or fresh chicken we had frozen. Well it was the frozen kind that has 717mg of sodium in every 4 oz. The fresh or natural only has about 30mg of sodium. It has 310 grams of chicken with my salad. I cooked the chicken and gave some to Kirsten and she not once mentioned it was the wrong frozen chicken. I sit down and eat. I finish my meal and Kirsten says you know those were the high sodium chicken breasts, right? I immediately go into panic mode. I screwed up my entire day. In my oddness I blamed her but it's my fault. I really messed up. So I can't eat anything with sodium for the rest of the day. I'm over on sodium for the day by 20%. That's with no dinner. I'm not sure how to fix this one. Why can't chicken just be chicken. Kirsten told me as she left the room that I don't listen to her. She said she had told me that chicken was the high sodium chicken. I didn't hear her. I guess I'll have a banana for dinner. No pizza for me.

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